One of the hardest things many people may grapple with on a daily basis is the fear of confrontation. Whether it’s the fear of confrontation from a loved one, a spouse, or a relative; the fear is the same, in how it manifests itself, and therefore-how to respond to it. Below, we offer the healthiest and most effective ways in which to deal with confrontation-in all situations-in your life.
1. Concentrate on Your Breath: One of the best things that a person who is overwhelmed by the fear of confrontation can do is to concentrate on their breath, and slow it down so that the inhalations and exhalations are measured, deep, and slow. By doing so, you relax your racing mind, your quickened pulse, and heightened sense of anxiety. In this new state, you are much more able to cope for an intense confrontational situation, should it present itself.
2. Prepare Your Words: For anyone who struggles with any fear of confrontation, preparation is the very best way to concentrate and deal with the stressful situation in a manner that is positive and proactive. In the case of any impending conversation or speech in which you feel confronted, preparing a plan for what you will say will not only dissuade you from paralyzing fear; but also, give you a focus for the subject of your confrontational talk, when presented with that agonizing moment(s). Consider what the situation is concerned with, and rehearse key points to cover and explain.
3. Use Logic: It is wise-alongside preparation and breathing technique-to make yourself consider in a thorough way, just what is being presented in this confrontational situation, and that it is-most probably-not as bad as you are gearing up for it to be. Nine times out of ten, people fear the imagined confrontation of a conversation as being a million times worse than the actual response. Consider the response to the situation with a realistic view to help you calm down.
4. Recognize Triggers: Everyone has different emotional triggers when it comes to the fear of confrontation. What makes you feel confronted? Take some time prior to the situation to consider this more carefully, so you know what situations to avoid, and also, what is a realistic response to a confrontation and just what you are fearful of. This will put your fear in perspective.
5. Announce Your Feeling of Confrontation: Another means of handling your fears of confrontational situations is to tell the person at the time of the event that they make you feel confronted. It is quite possible that they will evaluate this, and try to discuss whatever you are discussing in a more comfortable approach-as perhaps, they were not aware of how it affected you.
Good luck and be sure to share any additional tips



13. May 2010 at 3:52 pm
I love the tips you’ve shared here. Breathing is very important in any moment where anger can arise. I also love that you mentioned to ‘prepare your words’. Nothings worse than going into periods of confrontation with our words unprepared and when it’s all said and done, we wish that we can take them pack and exchange them with other words. Great advice!!
Thanks for sharing!!
15. May 2010 at 9:06 am
I notice that if I act very reasonable and non-defensive, asking questions instead of reacting with anger or accusations, that the confrontation very quickly de-escalates and turns into a conversation.
15. May 2010 at 2:03 pm
Fatibony: Great list of tips. I think it is so important to always strengthen our ability to appropriately deal with challenging situations. If we have a plan and a consistent approach, then we are much less likely to just react based on emotion when a situation arises. The reality is that we are going to consistently be confronted with situations that are challenging, but if we are able to consistently apply good techniques, we will manage situations much better.
16. May 2010 at 10:30 am
Thanks @Jarrod and I agree with you “Nothings worse than going into periods of confrontation with our words unprepared and when it’s all said and done†Thanks @NP for highlighting your strategy which I believe can help others too . @Sibly thanks for your contribution; good techniques which are consistently applied is certainly another way forward
16. May 2010 at 1:53 pm
Of course the most difficult type of confrontation is the spontaneous kind. The angry co-worker, the upset spouse, the annoying friend, etc.
All your tips can certainly be applied, especially recognizing triggers.
17. May 2010 at 3:49 am
Thanks for posting, Lots of great food for thought so to speak. I look forward to more blogs in future
18. May 2010 at 4:33 am
Thanks @One of the Guys and @Richard for your comments
1. June 2010 at 8:21 am
Great stuff here. This content is extremely helpful. Keep it up =)
12. June 2010 at 11:43 am
I argue very often w/ my sister, coz it happens very often, it’s hard to do the stuff you wrote above.. hehehe..
But i like your tipps though… ;>>
12. June 2010 at 1:58 pm
I am glad you like the tips…. sometimes we need to unlearn our old ways of doing things and learn new ways and with practice we become better in most things we do … and that could include dealing with confrontation. Thanks for visiting and I hope you find what works for you so you could enjoy being around your sister.