Self Help Wellness

 In our last post Traits of Emotional intelligence we asked ourselves questions because Questions focuses our thinking.  By asking empowering questions like what’s good about this? What’s not perfect about it yet? What I am going to do next time? How can I do this and have fun doing it ~Charles Connolly…can certainly be useful to ……

 Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

1. By Emotion Management;

Take responsibility for your emotions and personal happiness.

 Balance your emotions.

 Heighten your awareness.

Develop and learn

Look for the positive in the negatives

People with high emotional intelligence take responsibility for their emotions and personal happiness. They are usually self directed and are able to balance their emotions and intellect in most given situations .Research has proven that we are wired to feel before we think and this is a survival instinct. Hence,the reasons to heighten our awareness of our feelings in order to manage our emotions. It is that once you are aware of your emotions you are better able to employ, develop and learn of coping skills to manage them . For instance, lets say I will go to the gym to distress as suppose to screaming the house down. How does that sound? The Key in this example is our ability to look for the positive in the negative.

2. By Taking responsibility of your feelings;

Recognise your negative feelings and address from source.

Learn to condition your mind to your benefit.

 Be honest with yourself and learn to take responsibility for your feelings.

Easier said than done! But one thing to remember here is that provided you are not on any form of medication/drugs which can influence, manage or alter the chemicals of the brain linked to thoughts and feelings then to some extent most of us can learn to take responsibility for our feelings. The keyword here is Learn and  improve your emotional intelligence. The truth is that we can learn to condition our minds, bodies, and emotions to link pain or pleasure to whatever we choose. By changing what we link pain and pleasure to we will instantly change our behaviors~ Tony Robbins.

Find time to reflect on your feelings and try not to point to others for the way you feel all the time. One thing we all have control of and are responsibly for are our feelings it’s in us and not the other person. Situations, circumstances and people will affect us one way or the other but we have the power on most occasions to choose how we respond.

Try and recognize your negative feelings look for and identify the source then come up with a ways to address it or them  from its root.You can sought help  from a therapist or any other relavant helper as needed.

3, By Seeing  The Bigger Picture: Remember emotional intelligence is not about just you; its also your ability to be considerate of others or those around you. Are you aware of how your actions, how words affect others and are you able to manage those effectively? Are you a good listener, or quick to jump to conclusion , do you judge people consistently and can you be empathic towards others ?

More areas to develop  to improve our emotional intelligence are Motivation, Empathy and Social skills. To read  and find out more simply click on me here!

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